a glass box

by a glass box

/
  • Streaming + Download

    Includes high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more. Paying supporters also get unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app.

      name your price

     

1.
03:36
2.
01:27
3.
04:11
4.
05:25
5.
05:18
6.
00:56
7.
07:17
8.
9.
10.
11.
04:07
12.
13.
05:46

about

a glass box presents a self-titled hour-long exploration of mortality, the fear of death, and reflections upon the traumas of life and birth.
before the sun sets upon our final days, we must ask ourselves if we can truly face the fear that, while death may come for us in different ways, we may never reconcile the demons of our pasts.

credits

released April 25, 2016

Delilah Luna (lyrics, music)

tags

license

all rights reserved

about

a glass box New York, New York

my name is delilah luna and i'm a queer trans girl from boston (currently in NYC)

a glass box is an exploration of mental illness, trauma, queerness, the east coast, youth, and everything that life has given me and taken from me

contact / help

Contact a glass box

Streaming and
Download help

Track Name: The Fear
Maybe I will sleep tonight
Maybe I’ll be all right
Follow me, follow me, follow me into the light
The moon in the void is bright

Maybe I will live through the day
So that my lungs will decay
Please don’t go, please don’t go, please don’t go away
Hold my hand to keep the dark at bay

And every time that I’m alone
The tremors tear me bone by bone
And every time my heart skips a beat
I can’t breathe

And every night I try to sleep
But the fear keeps me awake

I don’t know who I am anymore
Without pills and blades and all my pain
Cut my skin, cut my skin, cut my skin again
So that I won’t die in vain
Track Name: [a doubt]
[instrumental]
Track Name: Bodies
I just want you out of my head
But that won’t bring you back from the dead

And what did you say?
That you’d never go away?
But what did you say?
That I could die today?

I just want you to haunt my dreams again
Before I crash my car off a bridge

And what did you say?
That you’d never go away?
But what did you say?
That I could die today?

And I cut my skin like paper
But please just let me take her
Back to my bed where we belong
We can spend all night singing this song
And maybe I’m not safe
And maybe I’ll die today
But I’ll let you go, okay?
So you can be someone else
Track Name: Ghosts
Year one, you still have time left
Your arms will turn red
And you will see your ghost
Yeah, you’ll stare at headlights
But the car will stop
And you will catch your breath

Year two, your body’s full of regrets
And your mind is full of dust
With lines and pills and razors
You’ll only self-destruct
For another night of fun

Year three, yeah, she stills love you
Even though she’s lying through her teeth
You’ll spend every night awake
Thinking that she’ll come home
But you only have so much time left

And I’ll admit
That I can’t forgive myself

It was four years ago today
That you thought you wouldn’t be here to say

I’ll admit
That I can’t forgive myself

And I’ll admit
That I can’t forgive myself
I can’t admit
That I still care about this
All the years I spent at home
Thinking about how I will die alone
Track Name: Lips/Teeth
That’s how the world began
This is all according to plan

Your hand in mine, our lips intertwined
This is our life in denial
The bruises on your neck, the blood in your veins
This is what’s left of our remains

And this is how the world will end
Do you think that I will plot my revenge?
(Well, it doesn’t really matter now anyway)

When we were giants
Did you ever stop to see the world?
(Yeah, well, before it burned to ashes and dust)

Well, I’ve been married to the moon
And I’ll be buried underground soon
Yeah, the writing’s on the wall
Maybe I will follow sleep’s call
And I, and I, and I, and I
And I, and I, and I, and I
Feel your teeth sinking into my heart, yeah
Track Name: [a sickness]
[instrumental]
Track Name: Epicene
Time heal me
Please breathe

I think my body’s sick
Like you always said

The bruises and cuts on my flesh
Staring back again
Can I see your skin
To make sure you’re still you

I think my body’s sick
Like you always said

Can you see me like I do?
Do you hate me like I love you, like I do?
Can you see me like I do, like I do?
(I think my body’s brave)
Do you hate me like I love you, like I do?
(To deal with my sick head)

I think my body’s brave
Track Name: Deceiving Heaven
A night in September
Collapsed on the floor
But we can’t remember
What all this was for

But I can’t fake
All the empty smiles I make

But I am free
As helpless as I seem
Free from the fear
That keeps me from sleep
But not in my dreams

But am I really weak?
As helpless as I seem
I’m scared that my mother will die
Like the time my brother found her wrapped in curtains
With blood on the floor
Or what about the time my father told me to cut my skin
And cry myself to sleep
His eyes were dead and nothing he said made me feel
Like I would ever be safe again
Maybe I’m weak for thinking about these things
Over and over and over in my head
But I think I need to just start things
Over again as a different person

But I am free
As helpless as I seem
Free from the fear
That keeps me from sleep
But not in my dreams, but not in my dreams
But I am here
As reckless as I’ve been
Tonight I will sleep
For as long as I live

It was raining out when I stepped onto the pavement
The drops were hitting my skin so calm and gently
You know a year can change you
One day you’re staring into headlights, only to wake up four years later still
Wondering why you didn’t keep laying on the ground
Some day I’d like to fall asleep before the sun comes up
Instead of thinking about all the times I said, “no I’d rather stay home”
‘Cause oh my god when will I fucking
Learn that this means nothing, if I weren’t so lazy, I’d

Pick up the bottle now and again, I’d cut deeper than a simple scratch
I’d call you to tell you that I miss you now and then, I
Feel like people are always lying to me, hiding from me, hiding their
Truth from me, like they can see me for the monster I’ve truly become
And yet I still think back to all the times my parents
Told me that my body is broken, that I mean nothing
That despite my best efforts, I have to prove that I’m still
Worth love, worth love, worth love, worth love

We weren’t artists, we weren’t creators, we were salvaged, but not saviors
We were just kids running around the playground pretending to be others
Like my father once told me, do you think you’re fucking special for wanting
To kill yourself, to kill yourself, to kill yourself, to kill yourself?
Try working since you were eight, try healing from a broken
Childhood, well maybe I did, maybe I did spend all those
Years hating myself, choking myself, waiting in fear and pain for
Death to come, well, don’t you think I’ve had enough?

But I’m so scared of dying, I’m so scared of living
And I’m so scared of everything that God has never given me
Tell me about the things that I can never have
Until I’m ready to burn in hell for all the sins that I have cut into my skin
That I’ve cut into my skin
That I’ve come to love again
That I’ve come to fear again

I set myself on fire to burn those around me
Track Name: [a lost cause]
[instrumental]
Track Name: Fluorescent Lighting and a Lack of Sleep
And the bright lights stain my mind
Watching the hollow hours crawl by
And with heavy sighs and empty eyes
We will lie to ourselves that things are fine
But we both know it’s just killing time
To kill the fears we feel inside

I won’t say that it’s all right
That it’s you that still keeps me up at night

And when will I realize how I’ve spent the past year of my life
Maybe it’s the lack of sleep that makes me afraid to die

I won’t say that it’s all right
That it’s you that still keeps me up at night
And maybe it’s the fluorescent lighting
That reminds me of every single time we ever slept together
Track Name: Be the Sky
We set the sun on our final days
Death comes to all of us in different ways

You are not the breath in my lungs
You are not the blood in my veins
You can’t keep me alive and young
You are not the skin that I cut
You are not the demons I love
You can’t cure me of disease

We set the sun on our final days
Death comes to all of us in different ways

We set the sun on our final days
To find out what we’ve become
Be the empty sky that takes us away

We set the sun on our final days
Death comes to all of us in different ways
Track Name: How Long Is Forever?
Falling in love essentially is waiting to die
Falling in love eventually will kill you inside

The way you learn not to care
Is to be so broken there are no pieces left to make you whole

Falling in love essentially is waiting to die
Falling in love eventually will kill you inside

How can I sleep when pills fail me?
How do I stop being scared of what’s to come?
Do you ever think how long is forever?

Falling in love essentially is waiting to die
Falling in love eventually will kill you inside
Track Name: The Flood
Maybe I’ll sleep tonight
Maybe everything’s all right

Here we are again
With the silence that comes at the end
I’ll admit that I still miss you
I’ll admit this is nothing new

All these bodies and their ghosts
The moon in her void, come to take us home

This is nothing new
Yeah, this is really nothing new

And then the rain came down and flooded everything you could see
We stepped out and splashed in the puddles
And watched the sun shine through the leaves
Until the clouds parted and the sun set on our final days
You could see the moon hanging in the sky
It really was the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen
But maybe it just a reflection of me, of me
Yeah, well, we thought we were invincible
But we were only kids, you know
We could only see so far into the future
We thought we could live forever
But that was just a childhood dream
Yeah, but now that I’ve spent so many nights
Choked by the fear that I will die
I can see now that nothing I will ever do can save me

This is nothing new
So just tell me “I love you”
Will you hold my hand
Until the very end?

I want to watch sunsets in color
So I can dream about them in black and white
Birth is trauma and transition is abandonment
And nothing will ever be right
So just tell me that you love me
Call me by my name like it’s a dirty secret resting upon your lips
So just tell me that you love me
So I can learn to sleep again
Just tell me that you love me
So I will never fear again
‘Cause someday I will die
And I will make peace with that